My Circle

Sadly I don't really have a circle. I don't have a ring of trust, love, and friendship. Most times I feel like all I actually have is me and my creator. I'm not really sure if it saddens me or even bothers me anymore. I just know that I would like an outlet. When I feel like the weight of the world is on me, I don't have that person to help me carry my load. Instead I try to cope and deal with things on my own. I stuff them away in my head and shield my heart as best possible. It doesn't always work. I often feel lost...left behind...forgotten. Things weren't always this way. I once had a circle. I had friends. I had my girls. Years tore that circle apart leaving me as one. When I need that outlet I often feel lonely. This moment is one of such solitude. The only friend I currently have serves as more than just a friend making things harder. Much harder actually because when things are awry amongst us...that's it. That supposed never ending circle I was once in seems more distant than ever. So my words...my computer...my phone...with the keyboard are all left of my circle. Just me, Fancy, and Franchesca.

Stay True

I wish the words would come to me like these tears do
Or maybe I pick up the phone and hear "I love you"
But yet I sit here with my heart in my hand
It stopped beating when you stopped being my man
I'm trying to realize where it all went wrong
How we gave up when we worked so long
I'm not understanding why we couldn't be
I blame myself but was it all on me?
You told me forever but I guess that was a lie
I thought it was til the end between you and I
Yet my tears meet at the end of my chin
I'm replaying everything over and over again
You seem to be happy and living your life
While you treat me like "baby mama" when I was supposed to be wife
Just pretend like you care, ease my heart's pain
Make me feel like my efforts weren't all in vain
You were my lover, my guy, my very best friend
Now I feel like this hurt has no pause or no end
Assure me that it is still I that holds your heart
Tell me its hurting you just as bad that we are apart
How can two people just give up on love's fight?
You and I both know this thing can't be right
I love you, I miss you. I'm supposed to be your girl
Why do I feel like this is the end of my world?
But what can I do? I cant force your heart's passion
I wish my heart knew of a less painful reaction
Cause my heart deserves better and so do I
So from now on I cant let these eyes cry
My love for you has not and will never change
But to experience pure bliss,this heartache I'll exchange
Just know the time we shared is what I'll never forget
My body will always remember the day our hearts met
So rather you're mine or you with someone new
My feelings for you will forever stay true

Hormonal or Reality?

Whats worst than being sad and down?
-Being sad and down with no one to talk to cause they will never truly understand.
>>>>story of my life